I've got the travel bug and man do I feel itchy. I swear it is all I think about. You know how everything can remind you of your adoption? Even things so ridiculous a normal person might think that there could not possibly be a correlation to adoption? "Boy these apples sure do look ripe and the price is great! Hrmm. I wonder if they sell apples in Vietnam and if Addison will like applesauce!" Well that's how I usually feel but right now that is how I feel about travel! "Boy these apples sure look ripe and the price is right. But I bet they taste even BETTER on the other side of the state! No way to find out without going there!".

I don't have a destination in mind (sure I'd love to travel to Vietnam rightthisveryminute but anything will do to feed this itch). One minute I'm suggesting a small day trip (like yesterday when I felt like having PF Changs for lunch so suggested we drive to our state capital - 2 hours away - to do it!) or big huge moves (as in selling our house and moving across the country). Reading other people's summer vacation getaways is making me even more desperate. I need a break.

Another issue is that I have come to the realization that here is not where we are supposed to be. I'm not sure were we are supposed to be yet but it isn't here. I love our house soooo much. I love our little lake. But I can't stand our city, I can't stand our neighbors. And we are too far away from civilization for those things not to make a difference. There is very very little diversity here - not in race, creed, religion, ethnicity, etc. One area there *is* a lot of diversity is the socioeconomic class but I've quickly learned a hard lesson - an asshole is an asshole whether they are rich or poor. Plus this town is very very conservative (and we are v. v. Liberal) - another uncomfortable way we just don't fit in. There are a few homeschoolers but most homeschool for religious reasons only and are clear that if they wanted their kids to spend time with my type of heathen, they'd just send their child to public school in the first place! So my kids are lonely too - or maybe this is my own transference onto them since they seem totally oblivious. Regardless, much to my family's bitter disappointment, a move will be in our future most likely. A few years down the road but out there, none the less. Or at least I need to believe that if I'm going to continue living here *now*!!

So I'm restless. I'm thinking of packing up the kids and the tent and just leaving. It sounds like cheap fun to me. So if I'm suddenly quiet here online, there might be a knock on your door! Watch out!